Bellydancing, How Do I Love Thee?

Ode to Bellydancing (aka More Bad Poetry) by Myrrh

Bellydancing, Rikudei Beten, How do I love thee, let me count the ways:

I love that you taught me to shimmy in my bedroom before falling asleep.

I love your costuming of shiny coin belts and brightly colored hip scarves.

I love that in your world, my hips are an asset.

I love that in your eyes, skinny girls are boring.

I love that you gave me the courage to bare my white stomach in public.

I love how your music speaks to a primal piece of me.

I love the comraderie of women who come together under your auspices.

I love when you inspire us to laugh at ourselves.

I love that you push me to try harder.

I love how my aching thighs feel after 2 hours under your spell.

I love when you empower women like me who aren't "dancers" to dance.

Learning To Do It... All Over Again

I think the first time I lead shacharit (the morning prayers) I was approximately 11 or 12 years old. Right around middle school our Solomon Schecter shacharit started resembling the adult service, and I was often looking to lead. We must've started actually as small groups, but over the few years I was at Sol Schec, it gradually became one leader each morning. And despite the lip service to egalitarianism back in 1992, only boys volunteered for the job. That is, boys and me.

I guess I didn't know that it wasn't cool to lead services.

I went on to be the regional Rel Ed of Pinwheel USY where my primary job was putting together the religious services of the regional conventions. But it doesn't take much to be the most knowledgable kid in the room in the Pacific Northwest.

And then after leaving USY and regular morning minyan truly fell into the category of "things I used to do," I started to believe that I really didn't know how to lead the service anymore. I never felt so comfortable in any given place that I knew the minhag habayit (the customs of the house).

Not so anymore! As a regular at the CY minyan, I've picked up a few minhagim, and there are others I am determined to dent. First, there are possibly one and maybe two women that have ever lead the service (also egalitarian) and neither of them are regulars. Second, it is the rarity rather than the norm for there to be any singing in the service whatsoever. As I've said before, why get out of bed for something as dull as that? (Actually I went searching for my rant on how boring CY services are, but couldn't find it. Is it possible that I kept this from you, my fair readers, all two* of you?! Let's just say CY services make NS's minyanaires look like the glee club. That bad.)

So, I sat down with the only guy who leads regularly who tosses me a bone and throws in a song here and there and went through the service... painfully slowly. And guess what? I know how to lead the darn thing. There are some pesky quirks that I can stand to review... when exactly do we do tachanun? when does the nusach switch? But other than that, it will be smooth sailing for me and I'll be back where I was at age 11. Leading services again.

*I stand corrected. My 3 readers. Bless you!

Lech Lecha M'artzeha U'memoladet'cha U'mebeyt Avicha

A little dilbert silliness for those who like to argue, a lot. Hmmmm.... do I even know anyone like that?


On a more serious note, yesterday I attended my creative writing class where we wrote on the topic of Lech Lecha. The way many people interpret the directive given from God to Abram is a point in time, an aha moment, an epiphany where everything changed for Avram. It could be described as the single instant when monotheism begins.

I, frankly, have a hard time relating to this interpretation of Lech Lecha. I wrote a piece for the class on the various moments when I have journeyed forth from my comfort zone to places that seemed strange and distant. But none of those experiences were so life changing that I would call them Lech Lecha for me. All my large life changes have happened as long drawn out phases, or if they were moments of epiphanies, they often occurred in mundane places like riding on the public city bus or sleeping under the stars.

If one looks directly at the text just prior to Lech Lecha, another interpretation is possible. We read that Avram was already a traveler prior to the God's intervention. Back at the end of Parshat Noah we read, (11:31) "Terah took his son Avram... and they set out together from Ur Kasdeem toward Canaan, but when they arrived as far as Haran, they settled there." The Lech Lecha moment was not directed to someone who was comfortably fat and happy and then had to all of a sudden make some kind of radical shift. No, Avram was already a seeker, a nomad, a man without a location and it was in this context that he was able to receive the Divine word.

Now, this is the kind of man I can relate to. As someone who has yet to live somewhere for more than 11 months since 1998, I feel a bit nomadic pushed and pulled to satisfy my academic and professional curiousity/development. Hopefully, I too can be ripe for Divine word... isn't that what is meant for each of us by the story of Avram's Lech Lecha?

A Marvelous Development

Woohoo! I am writing this post from my computer, sitting on my livingroom sofa... which means: I HAVE WIRELESS INTERNET IN MY APARTMENT!! Yes, a fantastic development.

For a bit of "overheard in NY" silliness, click here.

It is now officially cold in J town. See here for the latest forecast.

Despite my migraine yesterday, the shabbat lunch went swimmingly. I have to say that it was sort of a bummer that everything had to be cold considering the lousy rainy weather. But shomer shabbatiness won out and cold it was. I made tuna noodle casserole, assembled yogurt parfaits with granola and fruit, and served veggies, salatim and pita and no one went hungry.

This morning we had hasidut class first and midrash next. Hasidut is, at this point for me, more about learning a historical piece of Jewish ideology and theory/theology than about exploring my own personal theology. I'm not sure why I relate to it that way, but that's how it is going for me.

But the midrash class... yes, that is what I really love. We looked at a midrash on Lech Lecha, which is this week's torah reading. Who was Abraham? The story from Breishit Rabba (Parasha 39) recounts that R. Isaac said: For example, a man who is traveling sees a building in flames. The man asks, "is it possible that the building has no one to look after it?" The owner of the building peeks out and says, "I am the owner." This is compared to Abraham who asked, "is it possible that the world is without a guide?" But God answered to him saying, "I am the Guide, the Sovereign of the Universe."
I think what R. Isaac (good name) was saying in this midrash was that Abraham was the sort of fellow who asked for God. He had an inquiring mind wanting to believe that the whole world was guided, undergirded by some unifying force. It is really interesting, because there is really nothing to this effect in the Torah text. Actually we are given virtually nothing on who Abraham really is. Considering he's the father of all Judaim, it might be nice to know. The stories that we know as children about Abram, (smashing his father's idols, for example) are all in the midrash, not in the text.

This leads me to think about how certain part of the midrash became part of the "Jewish canon" in a way that others did not.

I have to run to my creative writing class. Hopefully I'll produce something worth blogging about.

More davenning barbie love

See the link here to see more stunning feminist Barbie davenners. I want one!

The Kashrut Dillemna

I grew up in a kosher home, kept separate meat and milk dishes in my own studio apartment, and have never been remotely interested in mamash treif (ie. lobster, philly cheesesteak, pork lo mein, or any other truly nonkosher foods). That said, when I have lived with others, I ate vegetarian foods without regard to heschsher.

Here in Jerusalem it is very easy to keep a very strict level of kashrut. Most of the restaurants are certified kosher, the grocery stores by and large only stock ingredients that are hechshered and lots of homes have separate dishes. I, however, do not have a kosher home.

Sure, I would've liked to find a place to live that had everything. An apartment that had ample space, perfect location, functioning amenities, glorious sunlight, decent price, and oh yea, nice people to live with who keep kosher. And guess what I got? Everything listed above without the kosher kitchen. And it occured to me that it really wasn't that important to me at this moment. The reasons I have kept kosher in the past are manifold: I like that it connects me backward to my people and tradition. I think it is important to be mindful about what you put in your mouth and grow up with the discipline that you are not welcome to have everything on the menu. I think kashrut separates me from people in a way that is healthy and meaningful and it keeps me from eating KFC, which is probably the only fast food that has ever looked appetizing to me.

There are drawbacks, however, namely that lots of folks here do keep kosher and it means that neither can I invite them over for food, nor can I prepare food at my place to contribute to a communal meal. And this is limiting. As I blogged about here, food is really critical to the Jewish experience.

So, I've arrived at a compromise solution. I dropped some cash on some new dishes including: tableware, a pot, a pan, a knife and cutting board, dishrack and some utensils. And I will prepare food with them hopefully for the guests who will be willing to come over for a shabbat meal. And for those who won't come because there are nonkosher things in the kitchen - I can't be concerned about them right now. It isn't a perfect solution. I don't like dancing around while I cook being specific about where I place things and being careful about what I touch. But I think it will help me repay some of the debts I already owe to folks who have graciously invited me numerous times already and allow me to make my home filled with some of the sweetness of shabbat this week and in the future.

And given what I said way back in this post, I really have given up eating meat whole hog, as they say.

Shabbat Shalom.

Suspicious Packages....

As I spoke on the phone with my mom just moments ago, we both heard a loud shot. Sounds like they detonated a suspicious package.... in my living room. I went out on the mirpeset (porch) to figure out what was going on. A kindly neighbor yelled up from the 3rd floor that someone had left a section of an old computer and the police treated it like a suspicious package... Yes, they did detonate it. Oy! The joys of living in Israel!

**Just so you know... this is probably my 3rd or 4th encounter with some sort of suspicious package protocol. It just part of the everyday here.**
....
In other news....

• Today is my eema's birthday!
  
• The last post on this blog was my 100th. Now if only more people would read the darn thing.
  
• My brother's wedding is 17 days away!
• Last night we had our first Yoreh (significant rain) here in J-town. Perfect timing for parshat Noah.
  
• My first grad school apps are due in 5 weeks.
• Right now I only have seating at my table for eight. That's a chair problem, not a table issue. And frankly, that's all I'm going to invite for now.
• I have FAR surpassed my goal of getting my behind to early morning davenning on a regular basis. Dare I say, it is becoming a bit of a habit or even an addiction.
• I have NOT COME CLOSE to my goal of being able to read, write, and speak Hebrew and Arabic fluently yet. Thank God there is still more time on this one.
  

A Bissel Learning

This week at Yakar, we had our first regular week, where we studied with four members of the Rosen family: Mickey (rabbi, dad), Gila (scholar, mom), Channanel and Shlomo (rabbi, sons).

Instead of going in depth into any of the topics, I'm just going to give a sampling of what we worked on this week.

Sun 9-11: Aryeh Kaplan
We talked about Kaplan's chapter from Jewish Meditation on the Amidah called, "Relating to God". One of the important issues that we touched on, that I am personally struggling with, is relating to a personal God. See, I'm not sure I believe in a personal God, so why do we (Jews, people in general) try so hard to relate to God in that way. Are we incapable of relating to the universal God in my head? More thinking to do on this.

Sun 11-1: Midrash
We studied Jeremiah 23:29 by looking at Sanhedrin 34A and comparing our translations with the Soncino and Artscroll. He hammered home the point that there can be no other translation than our own. I get it!
Then we looked at Midrash Breishit Rabbah 8:5 which tells the story of God discussing with the angels whether God should create the universe. The angel of goodness says, "Yes, because they do good deeds." The angel of truth says, "No, because they are liars." The angel of riteousness says, "Yes, because they do riteous acts." And the angel of peace says, "No, because they are all fighters." Then, for some unclarified reason, God flings the angel of truth to earth with the proof text, "Emet me'eretz titzmach," meaning something like, "Truth grows/springs from the earth."

OK, yeah. Lots going on... not too clear. I don't want to recount the entire heated discussion that I had with CR over this story, but some interesting observations:

• For some reason emet, truth is singled out despite the fact that shalom/peace also thought the universe shouldn't have been created. Does that mean that truth holds a special place in the Godly sphere?
• Also, what does it mean that truth springs from the earth? Does it mean that the earth is somehow the barer of truth, authenticity, meaning in a way that the heavens do not?
• What were the rabbis getting at when they wrote this? What were the countervailing thoughts of the time that had them questioning whether the world should have been created at all?

Mon 9-11: Philosophy
In this shiur we worked on a really difficult set of talmudic texts looking at the issue of impure motivations for action. One text basically said that acts of Torah (however you want to define them) should be done for their own sake (whatever that means). And the other text said that if involve yourself in Torah and Mitzvot, the proper motivation will follow.

Mon 11-1: T'fillah
In this shiur, we cruised through the entire Tanakh looking for episodes that might be the precedents for modern prayer. There are tons among them, the song after crossing the red sea, when Moshe cries out for God to heal his sister Miriam, some of the many times that Moshe and Aharon fall on their faces, when Avraham speaks to God trying to save the people of Sedom and Amorah.
The issue that I have to work out here is getting out of my own box. For me, prayer has a form in my life. I haven't made it up, I have been active in it all my life. And while this has many more benefits than drawbacks, it means that I have trouble conceiving of prayer in any other way than the way that I know. This is why I had such a hard time getting into meditation and it is why I struggle with understanding alternate types of prayer. I have trouble conceiving of anything outside of communal prayer. Some stuff to work on.

Wed 9-11: Spiritual Counseling
One of the previous Dorots, DB, is a chaplain and is working with us to analyze and synthesize some of the work that we are doing in other classes to be able to apply to the real world. For next class I have to make a presentation on my own spiritual journey. Some thinking to do on that one.

Wed 11-1: Pesishka Hasidut
Rabbi Mickey is an adherent/follower/scholar of this type of hasidut and we finally learned what he was talking about all this time. He gave us background on hasidut, as opposed to the world of Litvak Ashkenaz thinking. And we learned some of the particularities of pesishka thinking. My inner Litvak is having some issues really understanding hasidut, but I'm hoping that in due time...

Another Midrash I Quite Like

A certain gentile asked Rabbi Joshua: “You have festivals, and we have
festivals. We do not rejoice when you do, and you do not rejoice when we
do. When do we both rejoice together?”
When the rain falls,” answered Rabbi Joshua.
From Midrash Genesis Rabbah, 13:6

I took the translation from somewhere else, but I'm going to look up the original when I get back to Yakar (Wed) and do a little more digging on it. In the meantime, I'm just going to enjoy it for the simple p'shat interpretation.

Judaica Envy

Today I bought for myself my first Tanach. Oh sure, I received Judaica for my Bat Mitzvah and other assorted holidays, but I think there is something special about purchasing exactly the special book you are looking for and intend to use for a long time. Whew!

But there are other books and ritual objects that have caught my fancy. Like T'fillin boxes. There are probably thousands of pairs of t'fillin on the planet that are buried under junk in closets not to be unearthed for years, only to be discovered when moving or when someone dies. They are family heirlooms, relics, and deserve to be in a museum. But not my t'fillin! I wrap those boxes and leather straps every morning. I love 'em. The leather is soft from use. They are a bit smaller than average, more dainty, feminine (if t'fillin could be called that). I got mine for my Bat Mitzvah and always felt very powerful with them on. And what surrounds them? Little boxes made of .... cardboard. Now that I've had them for half my life, I think it may be time to get something a little fancier, silver perhaps, to give these little ritual objects the kavod that they deserve.

And my tallit too, also an object I wear nearly every day. I was so excited to have it at age 13 - it wasn't the small "girlie" size, but also wasn't so large to be unwieldy. My father got it as a fundraiser for Ethiopian Jewry; it was made in Addis Ababa and has blue and silver stripes. Quite pretty. But it is now stained beyond repair and I think it might be time to graduate to something new.

There are lots of other things, but there is also a part of me that does not want to collect extraneous stuff, just because. (Many of you have already heard my "stuff" rant, so suffice it to say that when you get stuff, you have to clean your stuff, and store your stuff, and move your stuff, and insure your stuff, and when it breaks you must fix your broken stuff, and as they say here vechuley etc.....) So what is "necessary" (ie sufficiently enhances your religious experience to warrant purchase) and what is just excess? A tough call.

...

As a side note to this, people here have these hilarious t'fillin carrying cases which supposedly can withstand a bomb attack. If I was in an attack, God forbid, the last thing I would think about would be my t'fillin, but I digress. They were made specifically for soldiers, but now the cases are considered really cool by Americans who are visiting Israel for the year. If I knew any of those people, I'd consider them cool too.... *whistling begins as eyes roll to ceiling*

Just... Don't... Do... It!

That's what I kept saying to myself as we read the parsha this week. I said it to Eve as she was tempted by the snake, and again to Cain before he slayed Abel. And they never listen. Never. Always the same thing, year after year. Why don't they ever learn? Do we ever learn? Do we keep making the same errors even after being warned? Does the situation just look different to us, or do we intentionally bang our heads on the car door, yet again? Hmmmm....

...

As a followup to the food post from yesterday I did end up making sweet potatoes but used honey instead of maple syrup (a purely financial decision) , added a pretty substantial amount of cinnamon, pressed fresh ginger, and cayenne. Magnifique! If I do say so myself.

...

And tomorrow starts another week in paradise. Jewish studies classes, a trip down south to work with the enviros, bellydancing, Hebrew tutoring... the works.

Food and Other Shabbat Necessities

Today I am heading over to SM's house to make mashed sweet potatoes for shabbat lunch. Last week I prepared devilled eggs and spinach stuffed zuchini. (The eggs were a hit, the zuchini lacked something.)

I always understood that my mother considered her careful preparation of food as both a labor of love and an artistic expression, but for me it is also a religious experience and a necessary element for communal religious time. Festive food, symbolic food, shared eating experiences are not just happy sideshows of Judaism, they are part of the main attraction. No one taught me this better than MH who, in SF, meticulously and lovingly prepares healthy food for shabbat meals. An inspiration!

This shabbat, where we read the first parsha of the Torah, Breisheet (Creation), I will also be spending some quality time with Martin Buber, assigned reading for my Judaism classes at Yakar. I will be thinking long and hard about Tohu V'vohu, the void and emptiness that existed before the creation of the world and about Cain and Able, which can only inevitably lead to a contemplation of brotherhood in the private and universal sense.

With that, I want to give a shout out to MADI who, yet again, wins the BLB award - best little brother! Thanks for the editing, yo! And on his request, I'm adding some Hebrew words of the day:

• lir'kod - to dance, something I did virtually nonstop for 3 hours last night and I am sore, sore, sore
• la'shir - to sing, because why not?
• le'va'shel - to cook, apropos of the post
• le'hat'chil - to begin, because beginnings are good.

And for a visual interp of Breishit, check out Danya's page where she posts some of my faves from the genious Andy Goldworthy. No words necessary.

Palestinian Narrative

I just received the most obscene phone bill ever to befall me. So, you know what that means? No more calls from me! It's skype or nothing, my friends.

Today was another Dorot Day where we explored the Palestinian Narrative. We spoke with one historian who hit us over the head for an hour explaining how Israeli Arabs are mistreated. Then we went to the Old City where we met with a guy who works at a community center and seems to be active in local politics. He spent 18 years in Israeli jail (PFLP actions) where he came out "more human than when he entered". He realized that there was no place for violence in the world and decided to dedicate his life to children's education. Quite an amazing man! One thing that did bother me, was that he said that he supported the idea of a binational state on the land from the Jordan River to the Meditteranean Sea. He argued that any division of the land was only a temporary solution to a more eternal problem. But here's the thing... given the demographic realities, a binational state means that this area will effectively be (best case scenario) an Arab Democracy, in the same way that the U.S. is a Christian Democracy. And while that goal may seem just dandy for him, for those of us who have a stake in preserving a Jewish Democracy, that scenario is totally untenable.

Finally we watched Paradise Now about how two friends are recruited to be suicide bombers. Wow... a "highly recommend" from me.

Tonight I'm going to the Jerusalem Boogie. Optimism abounds.

I Can Dance All Night...

Thank God for the week after Sukkot. I've been in this country since the middle of August and only this week have things finally fallen into routine. About time!

I started my Jewish learning this morning. We studied the line, "V'ahavta L'reacha Ka'mokha" Love they neighbor as thyself. Woah! A tough one, indeed! Think through this... what is the difference between the above line and "Do Unto Others What You Would Have Done To You" or "Don't Do Unto Others What You Wouldn't Want Done To You"? They are all limiting in different ways. Possibly the last one, said by Hillel and his esteemed contemporary, Jesus, has a lower threshold of activity, but is possibly more achievable.

Then contrast all the above statements with the idea that we humans are all made in God's image. Which concept is more all-encompassing to define our treatment one to the other?

And then add in the triumvirate ideas that Mickey presented to us.
A) Person X and Person Y can both feel bound by God's laws and create a triangle effect where God imposes on them proper behavior.
B) Person X can seek to see the Godliness in Person Y and vice versa. Then God is in the center of the continuum where X and Y exist.
C) Or X and Y can treat each other with such kavod and respect and all other good things, that God invites him/herself into their relationship.

I think each of the options is relevant at different times, but they are neato to think about.

Later on in the day I attended my FIRST BELLYDANCING CLASS in Israel. Yessiree, it can be pretty intimidating to do Middle East style dancing in the Middle East with a group of Yemenite women. They had the moves and so did my teacher, but they all praised my abilities and I loved it. It will definitely be a regular part of my week.

Affirmation

This afternoon I spent some quality time with my cousins-once-removed who are visiting Israel from SF. We went to the Western Wall and the Davidson excavations surrounding the Southern Wall. Very cool.

And earlier this morning I went to a conference jointly delivered by professors from Hebrew U and from various universities in Turkey on infrastructure and water. Some interesting ideas addressed:

Eran Feitelson talked about what sorts of issues get addressed in international agreements and he concluded that it is not dependent on the actual significance of the environmental ramification of the issue, or even if the issue has significant political salience. The number one reason determining if issues were addressed by international agreements is if it has an NGO or goverment group championing the cause. Hmmmm....

And Itay Fischhendler talked about some of the nitty gritty issues in Israeli-Palestinian water management. One of the most difficult webs he wove was about wastewater treatment in the Mountain Aquifer. Get this: In terms of the Mountain Acquifer, Palestinians are upstream from the Israelis, so any pollution or untreated wastewater from the Palestinians finds itself into the Israeli water system. Israelis, having high water standards, have build wastewater treatment plants in Israel to deal with this unnacceptable effluent. And since the Israelis claim that the Palestinians polluted the water in the first place, the Israelis have paid for these plants with the tax money that they are witholding for the Palestinians. Yes, a difficult issue indeed!

During the whole series of lectures, I couldn't help but feel reaffirmed in my desire to pursue this topic in graduate school and in the rest of my life! A great feeling, indeed!

Makes Me Want to Love Barbie

I have at least three posts that aren't quite finished on Geshem, buying lulav and etrog in Geulah, and other assorted adventures. But just check this out in the meantime:



Photo stolen from Danya.

Pagan is as pagan does

Some things about paganism are really unappealing - the idol worship mostly. But some things are not only superduper appealing, but they are actually part of modern Jewish practice. Hoshana Raba, this morning - case in point. I'll describe it from an outsider's perspective.

50 people crowded into a room built primarily for study. They conducted their normal prayer ritual which involved a lot of mumbling in a foreign language that many of them don't understand, some bowing, some sitting, and some standing. Some of the people looked bored, others completely in rapture.

Then, departing from their regular ritual, these people pulled out long stalks of palm branches, flanked by willow and myrtle and a little yellow fruit resembling a lemon. They proceeded to shake this assortment of nature at least a dozen times while reciting some sort of incantation. Some of the participants were vigorous shakers, others more modest. Then, virtually the entire group of 50 formed a conga line through the room, reciting more archaic text and circling the room - seven times. (I get dizzy just thinking about it... and it gets better.)

Finally, after the conga line disintegrates, each person removes the willow branches from their assortment and proceeds to beat the willow against the ground (making an utter mess) and asking God for rain.

Afterwards, the service regains its composure, adds a whole additional section, and finishes.

Yes, we Jews think we aren't pagans. Think again!

Part of the Club

I think they're gonna kick me out of the PK club... that's preacher's kid to you. I had no idea what hoshana raba or shemini atzeret was . When someone asked me, I looked back at them completely dumbfounded as if they were speaking another language... oh wait... they were speaking another language.

Anyway, hoshana raba is tonight and that means I have just hours to do all my final repentance before the book of life is sealed with a verdict for the year. Yikers. Apparently it also means that tomorrow morning we're going to beat some willow branches against the ground. Poor willow branches.

Tonight I went to a gathering at GW's house where we meditated for a while and then some people gave little d'var torahs. One of the points brought up was about the invitation of guests. On sukkot it is traditional to bring the archetypal guests, the ushpizin, into your sukkah, or temporary dwelling. Sort of interesting that we would consider inviting the most esteemed individuals in Jewish history: King David, Abraham, and Moses, among others, into this little shack that we've erected for the season. The other time Jewish tradition dictates that we invite guests is on Passover where we say, "Let all who are hungry, come and eat." On that holiday, we set the table with the finest silver and invite the poorest members of the community into our homes.

First, the interesting dichotomy. Wouldn't you set the table with your finest silver if Avraham Avinu was visiting? Why do you necessarily need your fanciest duds for the poorest members of the community? Hmmmm.... Food for thought.

Second, the fact of the matter is that King David does not actually come to our sukkah nor do we throw open our doors to bring in the neediest members of society. Why not? Isn't it what the text says? What does it say about us that neither thing actually happens?

This Just In

And just as I clicked "post" on that last message, I heard a strange sound. One that I haven't heard in many months, but has been promised during this week. I went on to the mirpeset to check - yep, we have rain in Jerusalem.

Happy rain from the girl obsessed with water!

On to Politics

Having fully recovered from my first migraine in the holy land, I'm back to commenting on the important things - POLITICS.

So I read this story over at jewlicious. I won't give all the details here, but they describe a scenario where a leader in the Peace Now movement is called to reserve duty to protect the settlements, and shock of all shock, he suits up and reports for duty. This reservist is subsequently told by the settlers he's charged with protecting, "We must demand his company commander to send this man home. How much longer can we agree that an Israel hater of this sort is in our midst while keeping our mouths shut?" Those folks over at Jewlicious finish off their article saying, "What a mighty tangled web we weave…"

I'm sorry, but this isn't really such a tangled web. This is the case of a man who acts in his private capacity to protect his country by advocating a change in policy. When called for public service, he does as he is told. The settlers are flat out arrogantly wrong to think that they might have a say in which soldiers come to protect their settlement - one that is blatently illegal anyway - especially when that soldier acts according to orders. To the folks over at Ateret - you should be ashamed of yourselves!

Grad School Apps

I think I have figured out where to apply and to which programs. This is probably the hardest part of the process.

PhD programs
Indiana, Bloomington: Public Policy
UDub, Seattle: Public Affairs at the Evans School
U Cal Berkeley: Geography
Arizona, Tucson: Arid Lands Resource Sciences
Rutgers, New Brunswick: Global Affairs
American, DC: School of International Service

Possibly apply
*Yale: School of Forestry*
*Michigan: Natural Resources and Environment*

MA programs: I am applying to some MA programs that are a backup if I don't get into a PhD program
NYU: Kevorkian Center
San Francisco State: Geography

Possibly apply
*Hebrew U: Public Policy
*American, DC: Global Environmental Politics*
*Columbia U: Liberal Studies? Masters of International Policy?*
*Stanford: International Policy Studies*

Fly/Mosquito

Dear Fly/Mosquito Buzzing Around My Head ALL. LAST. NIGHT.

I understand that in the scheme of things, what you did last night really wasn't so terrible. A little flying aerobics here, a little buzzing there... what's the harm? Well, I'll tell you, because of your little foray into my bedroom last night I woke up countless times. I even tried to open the door and release you from the confines of the room. But, alas, it was to no avail. You buzzed all night long, leaving me no peace.

But, you protest, it was just one night! I will hear none of it - your brother was here the other day, your uncle came to stay for the entire first week I lived here, and I shoed one of your good buddies out just minutes before retiring - or was that you!?

Please, there is a whole world outside my bedroom door for you to buzz and bother. Please don't return.

Loose Ends.

Last night I went to see my family in Beit Shemesh. I can't believe that it took me two months of living here before I managed to drag my behind to their home. And what a home it is! Magniv - as they say here! I got a healthy dose of "when are you making aliyah?" and veggie burgers. Fun was had by all.

Today is all about lose ends, such as:

• Where am I studying Hebrew? I think a private tutor may be where it's at. Must get that together.
• Must see about joining a gym. Running on stone will definitely shorten the lifespan of my knees.
• Look into buying a small desk for my room. I hate purchasing furniture for a place where I will live for such a limited span of time.
• Plan a hiking trip for Thurs/Fri. The desert here I come, again.
  

Approaching Godliness in the Sukkah

Last night I went to Rabbi Mickey Rosen's house of Yakar who is the head of my little Jewish learning community that I recently joined. As much as I liked the Sukkot celebration on the kibbutz, there is still something special about doing the traditional thing - sitting, studying Torah in the Sukkah. Interesting stuff we talked about:

First we looked at the Mishna and Gemara about building a sukkah. 2: The mishna says, " A sukkah which is more than 20 cubits high is not valid.... One which is not ten handbreadths high, or which has not three walls, or which has more sun than shade, is not valid."
The Gemara goes on to have an incredibly tedious explanation of why the 10 handbreadths is important. The rabbis say that the holy of holies was 9 handbreadths tall and the lid was 1 handbreadth - equalling 10. R. Jose (that's Yosi, not the mexican Jose) says, "neither did the Shechina ever descend to earth, nor did Moses or Elijah ever ascend to heaven" meaning that the Shechina (God's essence or something) came as close to earth as 10 handbreaths and Moses and Elijah only ascended as high as 9 handbreaths. - Wigga what?

At first glance, this whole discussion seems rediculous. Why couldn't they have just said that 10 handbreaths is the minimum size of a dwelling and the sukkah needs to be a dwelling? And then we realize that the rabbis are not just talking about the sukkah anymore. In fact, they are having a theological discussion about our relationship to God. They are contemplating what it means to create a holy structure in the liminal space between where God and people meet. But, you ask, isn't God everywhere, in each of us, holding our hands at times? Sure, certainly. But I think there is something valuable about the idea that God exists just above us and we have to do something to get there. If God is on the same plane with us all the time, then it is too easy to project all our human failings onto God. If God is somewhere else, somewhere close and even reachable, then we have something to strive for.

Yeah, I thought it was cool too.

Then we looked at the MishnaTorah chapter 8 of Halichot Shofar Sukkah V'lulav from Rambam who writes,"15: The happiness with which a person should rejoice in the fulfillment of the mitzvot and the love of God who commanded them is a great service. Whoever holds himself back from this rejoicing is worthy of retribution." One of the cited proof texts is from Samuel II 6:16 which states, "King David was dancing wildly and whistling before God." And the commentary on that quote tells a story of how King David was celebrating so emphatically with a total lack of inhibitions that Michal criticised him for acting in behavior unbefitting a king. But he explained that it was precisely his ability to shrug off his inhibitions that makes him fit to lead. Woah!

Did anyone understand that but me?

Basically what's going on here is another dictum about what is necessary to lead or connect with God. There are these barriers that are self or communally imposed that get in the way of true self expression. Very Buddhist, eh? And we need to expose ourselves in the most pure form which might mean stripping ourselves of our status in society or our prescibed notions of "propriety" to get there.

Yeah, those rabbis, smart guys.

The Luckiest Person Alive

It just occurred to me that I might be THE LUCKIEST AND HAPPIEST PERSON ON THE PLANET.

No, I did not just survive a freak car accident or anything weird/coincidental like that. I was just on the phone with my cousin, AG, who asked how I was enjoying myself in Jerusalem, Eer Hakodesh? And then it hit me: I live in Jerusalem, the holiest city in the world! And not only that, I get to do basically whatever I fancy here for the next 8 months!! And I have good friends. And a lovely place to live with kind and gracious roommates. And I'm part of a beautiful religion that is challenging and demanding and part of a glorious tradition that reaches back farther than I can even fathom. And I'm healthy. and, and, and.

Lovely Sukkot

Eran's kibbutz is positively lovely. He kept saying that it was the prettiest kibbutz in the country, but doesn't everyone say stuff like that about their hometown? My own experience, having spent significant time on Kibbutz Sha'ar Ha'amakim probably also set my standards relatively low. SH was a nice place to play for a few months. I worked in the sunflower fields and silo, I met a gorgeous Dutch surfer boy, I became tan and maybe even learned a thing or two about myself, but it didn't have a dynamism that is evident on this kibbutz. People are still eating here in the hadar ohel, the dining hall, and despite its overall privitization, it seems as though people aren't lamenting what was lost, but are excited about new things to come. A few things might be at play. First, the kibbutz has done very well financially with a number of different enterprises including drug development and importation, training seeing eye dogs, and producing baby food. Second, I did happen to visit on one of the most lovely nights that the kibbutz assembles all year.

Sukkot is the perfect holiday for a secular kibbutz. Sure the traditional liturgy thanks God for abundance, but it is essentially an agricultural holiday with symbolism that can translate easily to a secular setting. The kibbutz put together an hour-long variety show replete with singing (adults and children), a parade of the newborns for this year, and descriptions of the arba minim. (Oy! I just remembered that I haven't posted about my venture into the ultra-religious neighborhood to purchase said 4 species - must get to that soon! Back to the kibbutz.) It was lovely. We stood on the side with all the other "youngsters" laughing about how this year was the same as every year before. I couldn't help but notice Eran feeling proud for having brought his little American roommate with him to see his hometown in all its glory.

Then the kibbutz erects little stands for each of the industries that they work. I was introduced to dragonfruit that actually look like this. (I didn't take this pic as my camera is officially out of commission.)

Wowee! Have you ever seen something so incredible looking? They come in yellow too! And they are sweet, but not too sweet inside.

I had a grand ole time trying to figure out what the family was saying as everyone yelled in Hebrew over a quick picnic dinner that the entire kibbutz ate together.

The next day, today, we went on a little walk by the Alexander River, which is apparently named after a guy named Alexander who used to sell watermelons up and down the river. I learned about a neato pilot project they are using to purify the waters using man-made wetlands technology. (Maybe I should figure out how to work on some of these water pilot project here or back in the U.S. Then at least I'd be able to say that the technology makes sense to me.) And then we headed to the beach where, for the record, I beat Eran at backgammon! Quite a feat to beat an Israeli at their national game. He hung his head in shame.

Now, we're relaxing. He's watching an Israeli soccer game. I'm surfing the web and writing this post. A lovely shabbat!

Sukkot on Kibbutz

Tonight starts sukkot and what better way to spend it but to head to my roommate's kibbutz, maabarot, and hang out with some folks who till the land. Apparently, in years past they had a parade of all the agricultural equipment; it was cancelled this year due to safety concerns. Too bad.

Eran, my roommate, has received virtually no face time on the blog despite the fact that I spend obscene amounts of time with him. He's my Hebrew teacher, my escape from American Jerusalem culture, and he keeps it real with his hiloni (ardently secular) attitudes. He's finishing up his BA and starting his MA at HebU in Communications.

Stuff we talk about:

• How is it possible that I can get up every morning and want to davven shacharit, but that I also dress like a secular Jew?
• How are our lives different in terms of majority/minority status? He grew up in the majority culture, I in the minority?
• What are the cultural inheritances that we share considering both of us have German refugee grandparents?
• What does it mean to grow up on a kibbutz?
• What does he think about the American Jewish community?
  

Among lots of other things....

As the sisterhood at the mm says: Shake. Your. Lulav. But not on shabbat!

Falling In Love With Hamidbar

My Bat-Mitzvah Torah reading was Bamidbar, the first parsha in the book by that name. And I think, if I remember correctly, that my dad talked about wilderness and something... look it was my Bat-Mitzvah, I was supposed to be listening too?

Anyway, I just returned from a dorot day at HaMachtesh HaKatan, one of the enormous craters in the desert of southern Israel and I'm just in love - with the landscape, with the desolation, with the solitude and quiet that it affords. Yessiree I'll be back! I'm terribly exhauted from the hike, the heat and the conversation. Hopefully, I'll post more about "making the desert bloom."

Midrash, Conflation of Time, and the Individual's Insignificance

I decided not to take a midrash class that was offered at Pardes, mostly because it was just too big. I liked the subject matter and the teacher, but every time I had an idea, I just had to hold it in because otherwise I was monopolizing classtime discussion. No one likes that girl who talks all the time... and trust me, I've been that girl before.

But before I left I started thinking about midrash and how it impacted the people that wrote it... and possibly what it can do for us. This is, at the moment, an incomplete thought, so don't look here for total coherence.

The specific midrash we were reading was about the Akedah and it "cleared up" (lent alternate meaning) to some of the many questions in the text. For example, the text says that there were two "na'arim" boys who accompanied Avraham and Yitzhak part of the way. Who were these na'arim? Well, one could have been Avraham's servant, Eliezer. That makes sense. And one could've been Ishmael who is referred to in another place as a na'ar. The midrash goes on to put a nasty conversation in their mouths about who will inherit Avraham's property now that Yitzhak is going to be sacrificed. We discussed in class about how these two characters were written to symbolize the tension that Jews were feeling about the emergence of Islam and Christianity and who would walk away from this point in time having inherited the tradition of Abrahamic faith. Woah!

I was blown away. This stuff was really cool.

Then the midrash tells us that Avraham looks out on Mt. Moriah with Yitzhak and the two na'arim, Eliezer and Ishmael. There is a fire display taking place on the mountain, described using the identical language as was used to describe God's presence on Mt. Sinai. He asks each of the na'arim if they see the display, and each responds that they don't. Only Yitzhak is able to see the dramatic presence on the mountain.

The symbolism is pretty clear. Only Yitzhak, the progenitor of the Jewish people is able to see the Godly spectacle.

This part of the midrash got me thinking about the conflation of time. Midrash is more than a story. Sometimes midrash takes on more significance for Jewish tradition than biblical text. How many people know the story about Avraham smashing his father's idols? Yep, not in the text. But this midrash in particular allows a people at a particular point in time, to relate their experience to a text that is Godly. This strategy is amazingly useful in times of crisis. One can write one's own conflict into the Biblical reality so as to make it part of the neverending timechart of the Jewish people. It has the effect of shrinking/making nonexistent the progress of time. It can also make the experience of the individual insignificant and can give the individual comfort that he or she is just part of this chain of Biblically significant events.

Anyway, more stuff to chew on.

Get Your Butt to Israel

Now's the time to book your ticket. Prices seem to have dropped dramatically to just over $800 from the west coast. Delta, Air Canada are your best bets.

I hope to see everyone soon!

Yom Kippur aka Hag Ha'ofanayim

For those of you who have spent time in Jerusalem on YK, you know that the roads are empty - some are even roadblocked. So those non-religious types take the opportunity to bike around. I'm told even the highways are safe for bicyclists. Yeehaw! Too bad I was in schul all day.

My fast was relatively easy despite the fact that I had a lot on my mind (perhaps that made it easier?).

When I told my dad that they had changed the clocks the Sat before YK in order to make the fast seem shorter, his response was classic, "I guess that's the kind of thing you can do when you have a country!" - Priceless.

The next two days, I will spend preparing for sukkot which means:

• figuring out how to build a sukka on my little mirpeset off the kitchen. I think it will be pretty easy.
• buying the arba minim. From the time I was 5? 6? to 12 I went with my dad the day after YK to the Lower East Side and purchased lulav and etrog sets for the whole congregation. We used to look all around at the different sellers and always ended up at the same vender who gave us the the best quality for best price. I assume that it won't be hard to pick up that kind of thing here.
• researching nuclear, dimona and environmental stuff in prep for the dorot day that I am leading this Thurs. We are going to be hiking around machtesh katan, which is this crater in the desert near Dimona, the nuclear reactor in Israel. I think it is a mistake not to address the environmental issues, but there really isn't that much written about it except mostly Palestinian sources claiming that Israel is dumping nuclear waste on PA land - which may or may not be true, no way for me to know.

Let the Timestamps Do the Talking

A rundown of my evening.
12:21 AM: My last post.
12:40 AM: Go to bed.
2:00 AM becomes 1:00AM: We move our clocks back to make the fast seem shorter tomorrow.
I'm sleeping. Dreaming of showing up to services dressed innappropriately, like nude.
2:45 AM: Friend g-dog calls to see where the heck I am for the slichot services that I promised I would attend. He forgot to change his clock, so he's an hour early. Ugh.
3:20 AM: Receive call from friend who is coming to pick me up in SIX MINUTES. Must get out of bed, dress appropriately, and be downstairs stat! I put on jeans first before I remember that I have to wear a long skirt. Must change.
3:40 AM: Arrive in the neighborhood of the synagogue, but not exactly sure where it is. Ask at least 3 people for directions.
3:45 AM: Arrive with friend EB, the ezrat nashim (women's balcony) is already full. We take seats in the women's overflow section which is actually outside the synagogue, but covered.
4:00-6:00 AM: Slichot services. They were interesting. The tunes were totally unfarmiliar but beautiful in an eerie sort of way. EB and I spent some of the time shushing the tourists who were having a guided tour of the area (at 5am?!). Otherwise, lovely. And we were even able to see and hear most of the service.
6:00-7:00 AM: Walked home, drank coffee, read the news.
7:00 AM: Went to my neighborhood synagogue for, you guessed it, more services! Just regular morning davenning.
8:00 AM: Arrived home, totally exhausted....

Today, I have to get my apartment ready for the three people who are staying with me over Yom Kippur, do some laundry, take a nap, shower, dress, and be ready to go BACK TO SCHUL at 5pm for Kol Nidre. Thank God I don't have to prepare any food for this holiday.